Hayseed Brown

The mere mention of “Black Friday” will induce varying reactions across a broad spectrum. Some will seethe and wince, sweat trickling down their recently-dry brow with dread and apprehension of the upcoming shopping-induced mayhem; some may salivate in anticipation of deals and “epic” savings and even crossing names off their gift-lists before December even begins; and an even larger population may be just a bit confused about what the hell is going on in society. I fall into categories one and three, if anyone cares. But this isn’t about me, directly.

This is about watchophiles, in the collective. I know that’s not a word. Just go with it. Trust me. And the theory is that this group of passionate admirers has built up immunity over the years to this day of shopping frenzy and excess. It can’t catch us off-guard. There is no appeal. We laugh at the notion of one day dedicated to making the “purchase of a lifetime,” or even several of them, likely while bumping and clawing to the next available cashier. Let me explain.

But before I do, let’s take a look at some occurrences and human-shortcomings on this Friday of Black, 2014, just so that we’re all on the same page in terms of the dubious day in question. A wrestling match ensued in Michigan, where the top prize was not a championship belt, but a home theatre system. Local reports have declared the winner of the match “the man in the Chicago Bears jersey.” Figures. Probably a no-nonsense heavyweight. Two women in Los Angeles came to fisticuffs over a Barbie doll. Police called an end to this bout with no arrests. The fate of the doll was unclear. Shoppers in several places have reported items snatched right out of their carts by fellow bargain hunters. Solid technique. And even in the UK, things got a little rough when scrums and mauls were formed over discount panties. A girl’s gotta have her panties, right ladies? Can I get a woot woot?

Now that we are all on the same page, let’s get to the explanation. When one decides to collect watches and admire the art of watchmaking, every nuance of a watchmaker’s craft is vital and noticed. For the aforementioned watchophiles, it’s the details that matter, whether it’s the case, crystal, lugs, hands, movement, materials, beat-rate, minute-markers, jewels, hand-finishing, and the truth is I could go on and on. This makes picking one’s wristwatch a lengthy and painstakingly-enjoyable process. In other words, it’s all about the hunt.

And it’s not like watchophiles all have exorbitant monies to throw at the newest wristwatches on the block. Getting a good deal is more important to us than it is to the Black Fridayers, because we actually know value; we know exactly what we are getting when we complete that long-awaited watch transaction. The frenzied shopper knows no such value. They’re after the quick score. They don’t want to put in the time. For example, many Black Friday electronics are second-rate products that companies produce for the purpose of that very day.

But if there’s one thing we know, it’s time. A time to save, a time to buy, a time to laugh, a time to cry…turn, turn, turn. Sorry. It’s late. But the point is, we are educated consumers. We know that good things come to those who wait and who research. We know that an object of lasting beauty takes a while to both create and to acquire. We are not fooled by promises of instant gratification. We know that good things come to those who wait.

So, International Watch Leaguers, line-up and share your opinions on this matter. Just, please, no shoving.